We jump from one task to another, one message to another, one meeting to another, one browser tab to another. We react in habitual ways to other people, to situations. And we justify this as the way it should be.

Nothing wrong with that — but what would it be like to explore other possibilities?

What would it be like to pause and find stillness in a moment when we would normally be on autopilot?

Here’s what I’ve been exploring …

Every obstacle that we normally think of as a problem to be fixed … every “flaw” in ourselves or others that we judge as something to be fixed … what if we can pause, find stillness, and get curious instead of trying to fix?

For example:

• Someone is acting in a way that feels rude or wrong — perhaps my autopilot response is to judge them, complain about them internally or externally, and either try to fix the problem or avoid the person. But I’ve been exploring getting still, and bringing curiosity to my reaction — what does it feel like, why do I get triggered in this way? Then curiosity to the other person — how might what they’re doing make sense to them?
• If I’ve been procrastinating on something — my autopilot response might be to judge myself and feel inadequate, or maybe to avoid even thinking about it. What if I get still, and bring curiosity to how it feels to procrastinate on this, and what fear might be leading to the procrastination? Could I bring curiosity to why this task is even important to me?
• If I am complaining about something or feeling burdened by something — my autopilot response is to just get through it, feeling put upon and a bit powerless. Could I get still and bring curiosity to my feeling of complaint, burden, powerlessness? Could there be anything to explore in what I really want in this situation, and why I’m avoiding speaking up for that?

In this way, every difficulty becomes a place to explore with curiosity, and there is growth and learning and delight to be found in everything.

This process, for me, starts with stillness. And then deepens with curiosity.

What might it be like for you?

Like a house filled with clutter, our lives can feel like a huge mess.

Today I’d like to share an idea for getting things in order: just as I recommend for decluttering your house, create a place for everything that matters to you.

In our physical houses, things can get messy when we just put things in random places. So when we declutter, it’s not just about getting rid of things we don’t want — it’s also about finding a home for everything we do want. A place for everything.

Once we have a home for each item, it’s a matter of training ourselves to put them back where they belong. And once this is in place, things can feel much more sane. It’s not about keeping to a perfect system, it’s about knowing where things go, and then allowing ourselves to relax into that structure.

What if we could apply the same idea to everything else in our lives? If something is worth being in our lives, doesn’t it deserve to have a place?

For example:

• Tasks can go in one place, a task manager app or text list that you keep in one place. Instead of keeping them in various messages and inboxes, put them in one list.
• If you have recurring tasks or events to remember, you could put them in one place: a calendar, or a reminders list, or your task list if it features recurring tasks. But choose one, instead of using all of these and forgetting where your recurring tasks might be.
• Doing your finances can become a mess if we don’t have structure … so we can create a daily habit (like checking your accounts or budget program) and a weekly review to pay bills and take care of other tasks.
• Do you have a thousand browser tabs open? What if the tasks that each tab represented all had a place? Like a list of things to read and watch, a list of ideas to consider for the future, a list of websites you’re using to research a project, and of course your task list if the tabs represent tasks you need to do.
• If you have a thousand messages in 10 different messaging apps, you might create daily rituals for checking and replying to messages instead of doign it randomly.

These are a few ideas, but you might find other places where you life feels messy, and then find a place or a structure to keep that messiness organized. A home for everything.

In the examples above (which you are not limited to), the main places to keep things might be:

1. A task list for tasks.
2. A calendar for recurring events and reminders.
3. A notes program that has lists of things to read/watch, ideas to consider, research notes and links.
4. A daily and weekly finance routine.
5. A regular ritual to check and reply to messages.

If we had regular times in the day and the week to do these things, our lives would feel much more in order.